A Miss Marple and McGillicuddy Mystery

A stout cuttlefish asks a fluffy pink and white sea slug to solve a mystery...

"You've seen what, dear?"
Miss Marple had to be sure that Mrs. McGillicuddy was relaxed. Miss Marple knew how cuttlefish can get over excited about certain things.
"I swear, Jane," Mrs. McGillicuddy went on, "it was Ratchett! I saw the killer wrapping his sticky tentacles around that poor Babosa squeezing the life out of her in the passing train... It was so horrid; I can't believe it."
"You'll be fine," Miss Marple insisted, "here, take this pill, dear, it'll calm your nerves."
Miss Marple slid a 450 mg pill of Paxil down Mrs. McGillicuddy's radula. Mrs. McGillicuddy swallowed it down with some pink ammonia drink.
"Well, that was refreshing!" Mrs. McGillicuddy lightened up, "just what do you suppose I'd do?"
"We'll have to find out who that strangled Babosa is, first," Miss Marple suggested, "did you have a good look at her?"
"Oh, no!" Mrs. McGillicuddy shuddered as she thought about it more, "it was just horrible! She looked like her eyes were popping out of her sockets and her radula stuck out- all the way out like this-"
Mrs. McGillicuddy made the most silliest gesture as she had stuck out her radula that Miss Marple had to laugh.
Mrs. McGillicuddy smirked a bit.
"Oh," Mrs. McGillicuddy perked up, "how exciting! A mystery for you to solve, Miss Marple. I knew I could count on you to find out if what I had seen could have really happened, you know. Nobody believes me."
"Oh, yes," Miss Marple smiled, "I have a very good idea of what I think could have happened."
"Yes?"
"Mrs. McGillicuddy," Miss Marple looked sharply now, "how many optic tentacles would you say that poor strangled Babosa had?"
Mrs. McGillicuddy paused for a moment.
"What such an odd thing to ask!" Mrs. McGillicuddy said, "that's a very good question. I can't say I remember, Jane, I want to say maybe three or four..."
"Are you sure?" Miss Marple asked, "sure about four?"
"Yes, maybe five optic tentacles..." Mrs. McGillicuddy said.
"Five!" Miss Marple exclaimed.
"Well," Mrs. McGillicuddy went on, "five altogether - you know two of them were of that killer, how Ratchett! and three must have belonged to that Babosa I saw got strangled... Why's this so important to you, Jane?"
Miss Marple beamed.
"Oh," Miss Marple sighed, "it's nothing, really. I suppose it might add up to something, you know. Are you sure it wasn't the other way around?"
"Perhaps," Mrs. McGillicuddy said, at last, "it's so horrible! I can't remember; it just happened so fast... but I want to honestly say that it just had to be four and a half optic tentacles that I saw."
"Four and a half!" Miss Marple repeated.
Mrs. McGillicuddy didn't look quite so surprised at Miss Marple, who stood mumbling to herself in a very reflective kind of way and secretly hoped to find some kind of connection...
"It was the big four optic tentacles that frightened me the most," Mrs. McGillicuddy admitted, "with those huge black and red squiggly eyes... "
"That's it!" Miss Marple cried out suddenly.
"What's it?" Mrs. McGillicuddy questioned eagerly.
"Have you ever heard of the Big Four?" Miss Marple sounded excited.
"Oh, you mean the casino?" Mrs. McGillicuddy was also excited.
Mrs. McGillicuddy pulled out her smart cell phone and pressed her optic tentacles over the keys searching for the nearest space casino. There was one called:
"The Crackenthorpe Slots"
It was the biggest casino in outer space that was run by a rich and zealous space crab, whose name was SHAITANA...
Little old space slugs and cuttlefish who had nothing better to do loved going to the casinos.
"Precisely!" Miss Marple said.
Miss Marple went to her vanity and dumped everything out of her old sea shell Chanel purse. Scattered on the floor were a comb, breath mints that looked like white Lorazepam tablets, a bonnet made of pink yarn, a bunch of keys and a TUPPENCE.
"Aha!" Miss Marple shouted softly, "my lucky tuppence!"
How sneaky that little old pink and white fluffy space slug must have been... Having a Tuppence made everything seem even more gripping with suspense. Miss Marple tossed that tuppence over her optic tentacles cheering happily. It had been such a long time since she had a good adventure. Even though not heeding Dr. Haydock's recommendation of staying still, Miss Marple had to go out.
"Oh! Goodie!" Mrs. McGillicuddy said, viewing her little cell phone, "Tommy's almost here..."
"TOMMY? Who?" Miss Marple looked puzzled as she clutched her purse with everything back inside of it.
"Yes," Mrs. McGillicuddy reported, "he's our ÜBER driver!"
"How delightful!" said Miss Marple.
Miss Marple clutched her pink CHANEL purse and carried her favorite priceless lilac Victorian umbrella over her optic tentacles and slithered out with Mrs. McGillicuddy, who kept tapping on the cell phone, into the back seat of a Red ROLLS ROYCE.
"Hullo, ladies! Marple and McGillicuddy?" Tommy smiled, "you feeling lucky?! According to the NAV COM, I'm taking you to the casino, right?"
"Yes," both Mrs. McGillicuddy and Miss Marple said at the same time...
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